Monday, October 19, 2009

Black Devil Doll (2007)


Director:Jonathan Lewis Cast: Heather Murphy, Natasha Talonz and Gregory Solis as Cock Socker. A young moist buxom teen finds herself thrown into an odyssey of forbidden sex and unspeakable violence.What started out as a simple child's game dabbling in the occult 5 young hot big breasted chicks are raped,abused ,tortured and killed by an evil, jive-ass foul mouthed talking doll possessed by the spirit of an executed death row black militant.I only saw an extended trailer of this movie and thought it looked fucking great. Lots of laughs and blood shed the devil doll looks fucking hilarious. By the trailer alone i say...9 out of 10 dead hookers agree.

Happy Birthday to Me (1981)


Director: J.Lee Thompson Cast: Melissa Sue Anderson, Glenn Ford, Lawrence Dane. Virginia belongs to the best clique,the best student at her private school.After a freak accident a year earlier, suffering from blackouts her friends start dieing one by one could it be her? Not much else to say about this one but had some great gore for the 80's. 7.5 out of 10 dead hookers agree.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Hatchet (2007)


Director:Adam Green Cast:Joel Moore, Tamara Feldman, Deon Richmond, and Kane Hodder as Victor Crowley. A group of tourists go on a "haunted boat ride" where they hear the tail of hatchet killer Victor Crowley. when their boat sinks the group finds out that old Victor may still be hunting in the swamp and looking for new victims. Well with that said this movie will not be winning any Oscars but it was a fun movie,had lots of great gore and some good laughs, Kane Hodder should have stayed behind the Jason mask, he's not the best actor but his name go's along way.6/10 dead hookers agree.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Intro


I am the Grave Robber and as you can see i love Old School Horror. I will be reviewing old and new movies. These are my opinions and may not reflect your own.You are more than welcome to add your own opinion.See you in hell fuckers.

Friday, October 9, 2009

House of 1000 Corpses(April 11, 2003)

Written and directed by Rob Zombie this was his debut into film making. As much hype as this movie received and mixed reviews from variety of horror buffs, cult followers and outraged movie go-ers this movie received generally negative reviews. Although this film may have been sited as "cheesy and ultragory exploitation horror flick" It was a great watch, its interesting to place yourself in the position of these characters who are in the hands of unruling sadistic psychopathes amongst the characters their are Captain Spaulding a sadistic clown owning a small run down gas station/side of the road horror amusement ride featuring the most ruthless serial killers throughout time. Baby Firefly a gorguese blond killer with a cringing laugh undisputedly insane at first glance. Mother Firefly a derailed nympho and Otis B. Driftwood the most outrageous character in the film who dampers in Buffalo Bill behaviour and political tirades. This movie begins when a group of four young people arriving at Captain Spauldings road side attraction on a mission to list all of the road side stops you must see while traveling, they become infactuated with the the legend of "Dr. Satan", and soon become the victims of this families sadistic thrills. This movie is definitely one to watch, turn down the lights, close the blinds & “You gotta have the marshmallows, that's what makes it fun“. Rating: Must See Sequal: The Devil's Rejects (2005)

Automaton Transfusion (2006)

Directed by Steven C. Miller starring Garrett Jones, Juliet Reeves, William Howard Bowman, Rowan Bousaid, Ashley Elizabeth Pierce, Kendra Farner and Joel Hebner basically a bunch of unknowns. I rented this movie from Rogers video and they keep it in the restricted section, I always walk by this movie very curious about it the cover of the movie makes you believe it will be a all out gore fest oooo no that was not the case in fact is was very tame even for a zombie movie and the story line was absolute bullshit not to mention the acting had less depth then loaf of bread. Watching this movie you feel ripped off and you think it couldn't get even worse they do the most chicken shit move anyone can do its like they ran out of money and ideas and they just put To Be Continued... like how the fuck do you do that to viewers the least you could do is put together a shitty ending giving this movie a 3/10 Dead Corpses

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Book of Blood (2009)

Directed by John Harrison starring Jonas Armstrong, Sophie Ward, Clive Russell, Paul Blair, Romana Abercromby and Simon Bamford. A group of paranormal expert locate a house believed to be a cross road for the afterlife after a gruesome murder takes place. The movie itself is not very action packed but when things do start to stirr up the gore looks very respectable and the story line is very interesting and very original this movie had its few twist and turns but was not as good as I was hoping it would be but was still better then most of the stuff circulating the video store shelves o and there is a kick ass face peeling scene you have to see giving it 7/10 Dead Corpses

Trick r Treat (2009)

Directed by Michael Dougherty starring Quinn Lord, Brian Cox, Dylan Baker, Leslie Bibb, Rochelle Aytes, Anna Paquin, Moneca Delain and Tahmoh Penikett. Four interwoven stories are told in this movies not even close to what I had expected but even saying that this was still a pretty good movie with excellent characters and the stories intertwined very neatly without confusion but with all the good comes some bad. Some of the killings were incredibly cheesy, the potato sack head kid tries to kill a guy with a fucking snickers and also succeeds killing a girl with a lollipop ooo and you think it couldn't get even worse the little Halloween kid gets his hand chopped off and it begins to crawl around on the floor like thing from The Adams Family like seriously! with all that being said this was still a fun watch giving it 6.5/10 Dead Corpses

X Files episode(Home)1996


Cast: David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson. The remains of an infant with an uncharted amount of birth defects are uncovered in a field in rural-(Home) Pennsylvania .The only suspects are three brothers who lived on their family farm for 20 some odd years. They seem to live there alone.Or do they? If your into hillbilly nasty incest this is for you best t.v show ever loved it and it sickened me at the same time. I suggest no snacking during this show people just a heads up. 7 1/2 out of 10 dead hookers agree.

Dark Country (2009)


Director: Thomas Jane,Cast:Thomas Jane, Lauren German, Ron Perlman plot: Two honeymooners driving through the Vegas desert stop to help a car crash survivor but get more than they bargained for when he wakes up and all hell breaks loose. Well lets see....Thomas Jane should be embarrassed of this how do you go from The Punisher to this......10min into this piece of crap i almost turned it off if it wasn't for Lauren German's ice cube masturbation scene i would have gone no further. The way this was filmed was terrible the acting was bad at best and the ending really maid no sense.. if you ask me i say skip it. 3/10 dead hookers agree. I give it that only for the ice cubes.

An American Werewolf in London(1981)


Director:John Landis Cast:David Naughton, Jenny Agutter, Griffin Dunne. Two American students backpacking through England are warned by the towns people to stay off the moors but as they walk into the night they find themselves on the moors on a full moon where they are attacked by what one says's was a giant dog.After a stint in the hospital David goes to stay with the nurse that he met where he starts to have what he thinks are dreams of him running at night feasting on humans....Was a good movie for the 80's and a great sound track.Still stands up to the movies of today if you ask me, a must see for horror fans.7/10 dead hookers agree.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

ZOMBIELAND (2009)

Directed by Ruben Fleischer starring Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin oh yes and even Bill Murray. Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) is all alone and living in you guest it Columbus he seems to believe he has survived for so long because even before there were zombies he would hid in his room playing video games avoiding people. He later meets up with Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) a bad ass zombie shit kicker. The movie follows them and Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) as they try and make their way to some playland know to have no zombies all around this movie kicks ass. Lots of action, blood and comedy this movie is a must see giving it 9/10 Dead Corpses

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre(2003)


Director:Marcus Nispel Cast: Jessica Biel,Jonathan Tucker ,R.Lee Ermey as Sheriff Hoyt.Inspired by a true story. While driving through the backwoods of Texas on there way to a concert 5 youths pick up a hitchhiker who shoots herself in the head in the back of there van. Stopping at an old farmhouse for help was there first mistake where they meet up with the worst inbred family in movie history.....say hello to Leather Face. The blood flows fast and deep in this one my friends the best remake ever. (loved it). Was full of gore loved old Monty and what can you say but Sheriff Hoyt you are the biggest Asshole I've ever seen loved you. A must see for all Horror fans young and old. 10/10 dead hookers agree.

Idle Hands (1999)


Director:Rodman Flender Cast:Devon Sawa,Seth Green,Elden Henson and Jessica Alba as Molly.What would you do if your hand gets possessed by a killer?Well for Anton you hack it off and go about your daily routine of smoking weed watching t.v and lusting after the girl across the street. But his right hand has a blood thirsty mind of it's own and is hell bent on wreaking havoc. Loved the f/x in this movie lots of great laughs too. Could have used some T&A but what do you do. Still one of the best Horror comedys out there well worth the rent....8 1/2 out of 10 dead hookers agree.

Masters of horror episode 13 ( Imprint) 2006



Director:Takashi Miike Cast:Billy Drago,Youki Kudoh,Michie Ito

Christopher (Billy Drago)a 19th century tourist gets much more that he bargained for while searching for a Japanese prostitute (Ito) he fell in love with and promised to save and take back to America with him. Mick Garris the creator and producer of the series shelved the episode saying quote" the most disturbing film I've ever seen"and it was very graphic and parts were hard to stomach. Running less that 1 hour it packs it all in there.8/10 dead hookers agree.

A Crack In The Floor (2000)


Director:Sean Stanek cast:Mario Lopez,Gary Busey,Bo Hopkins. For the past 33 years Jeremiah Hill has lived alone... sorry people i can't do this anymore this movie was so bad my wife still brings it up to this day i watch this movie when i'm constipated to get my insides flowing if you see this movie at the video store steal it and burn it don't look it in the eye it has been known to make a man soil his pants with one glance.0/10 dead hookers agree.

Monday, October 5, 2009

S.I.C.K. (2003)

Director Bob Willems starring the worst acting you have ever seen. This movie was so shitty it made me S.I.C.K. the movie poster is the best thing about this movie everything else is garbage. First of all the clowns hid out looks like its made out on construction paper and the gore was so fucking stupid it looked like kidney beans and ketchup. I barley have anything to say for this review all I know is that this movie makes Andre the Butcher look fucking awesome I will not recommend this movie to anyone and I will not even waste the energy in my fingers to give it a rating, fuck this movie sucked!

Wendigo (2001)

Directed by Larry Fessenden starring Patricia Clarkson, Jake Weber, Erik Per Sullivan, John Speredakos, Christopher Wynkoop and Lloyd Oxendine. A family needs to get away on vacation and get away from everyday stress. On there way to their cabin they hit a deer with their car causing a heated argument with a local named Otis the story then drags on and eventually they reach the cabin where they feel the mysterious Wendigo or a half man half deer is wrecking havoc on their lives well basically the movie poster says it all blurry and a shitty fucking movie I do not recommend this to anyone steer clear of Wendigo giving it 4/10 Dead Corpses

Andre The Butcher (2005)


Director:Philip Cruz
cast:April Billingsley,Maury Sterling,Ron Jeremy
When a group of cheerleaders gets stranded on there way to the championship there hold up in an abandoned hunting lodge in the ha ha ha backwoods of Florida. Well now that's done this is the fucking worst movie I've ever had the pleasure to see the lezbo scene in the old house has to be seen to be belived worst acting ever but all in all a good time had by all who watched it with me.The whole budget was spent on the poster i think.3/10 dead hookers agree.

The Burning (1981)

director,Tony Maylam cast,Brain Mathews,Leah Ayres,Brian Backer.Billed as a Friday The 13 ripoff The Burning starts with a prank gone very wrong on Cropsy Camp Blackfoots care taker after 5 years in a hospital Cropsy returns to his old stomping grounds well lets just say let the blood bath begin. Look for stars Jason Alexander,Fisher Stevens and Holly Hunter.7/10 dead hookers agree.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Wilderness (2006)

Director Michael j Bassett
starring Sean Pertwee,Alex Reid,TobyKebbell,Stephen Wight.A group of juvenile delinquents are forced to fight for there lives after being sent to a British island after a fellow prisoners death where they are hunted one by one by a cross-bow wielding madman they must put there hate aside and band together if they want to survive. Fast paced action and lots of blood and gore to keep you watching lets just say haven't we learned yet to stay out of the woods.7/10 dead hookers agree.

Black Christmas (1974)

Director: Bob Clark
Starring: Olivia Hussey,Keir Dullea,Margot Kidder
This movie is simple a sorority house is terrorized on the start of Christmas break by an unseen psycho who sneaks into the attic and starts sick phone calls then starts killing them off one by one.This 98 min film scarred me to death when i saw it the first time not much for blood and gore but makes up for it with scares.Merry Deathmas everyone.8/10 dead hookers agree.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Orphan (2009)

Released to theaters (Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra) starring Vera Farmiga, Peter Sarsgaard, Isabelle Fuhrman, CCH Pounder and Jimmy Bennett. Kate (Vera Farmiga) and John Coleman (Peter Sarsgaard). have a troubled marrige with the loss of a child they adopt Esther (Isabelle Fuhrman) who at first glance is a very sweet Russian orphan. The movie presses and the family begins to notice she is unlike any other child far too mature for her own good and that is when Esther reveals a more sinister side. This movie is very good with excellent acting and a very good plot twist at the end. Orphan was much more then I thought it would be. Anyone a fan of creepy children? well this movie will make you want to dive into the screen and attack this creepy little girl. I loved to watch this movie unfold giving it 7/10 Dead Corpses

inside

director who really cares stars no one you know or care about anyway.
four months after her husbands death a woman on the verge of giving birth is tormented in her home by a strange woman who wants her unborn baby she torments her through the night and kills all who trys to help.The movie is in french with english subs but there is not much talking so it is not that hard to follow, it is very graphic and parts are deeply unpleasant to watch to tell you the truth i was almost ashamed to watch a pregnant woman endure the bloodbath. What the hell it was one of the best gore fests i've seen in ages loved it ! 8 out of 10 dead hookers agree

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Drag Me To Hell (2009)

Released to theaters (Directed by Sam Raimi) starring Alison Lohman, Justin Long, Lorna Raver, Dileep Rao, David Paymer and Adriana Barraza. Christine Brown (Alison Lohman) works for the bank approving and declining loans and on the verge of getting a promotion when the Gypsy Mrs. Ganush (Lorna Raver) asks Christine about approving a loan for her home she denies her for the sake of her promotion. Mrs. Ganush bags and pleads for her to reconsider but is removed from the building. Mrs. Ganush attacks her and places a curse upon Christine. Drag Me To Hell is a excellent movie full of dark hunting's and tid bits of humour. The way the movie is shot and how it it animated really sets the mood for the movie funny and graphic all wrapped up in 99mins. A must see I recommend this movie to all even those who are not fans of horror will even thoroughly enjoy this flick giving it 8/10 Dead Corpses